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South Park Quotes
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Here are some of the funniest quotes from South Park. Check them out. You can add your own funny South Park quotes using the form at the bottom of the page.
| Cartman |
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 I'm sorry Kyle but you have the three J's...Jinger Jersey Jew.
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Shut the f*ck up fatty!!!
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p31.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Cartman: "I\'m sorry Kyle but you have the three J\'s...Jinger Jersey Jew." Kyle: "Shut the f*ck up fatty!!!" ',737,0)) - Season 14 - It's a Jersey Thing
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| Mortician |
You know, I think death is least funny when it happens to a child.
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/logo_for_fb.png',' ','South Park Quotes','Mortician: "You know, I think death is least funny when it happens to a child." ',742,0)){kind=logo} - Season 1 - Pinkeye
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| Cartman |
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It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a woman's separation to increase the population. This type of penetration will increase the younger generation.
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p31.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Cartman: "It\'s a man\'s obligation to stick his boneration in a woman\'s separation to increase the population. This type of penetration will increase the younger generation." ',752,0)) - Season 4 - Do the Handicapped Go to Hell?
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| Cartman |
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You need a friend. A chocolate friend.
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p31.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Cartman: "You need a friend. A chocolate friend." ',945,0)) - Season 4 - Fat Camp
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| Cartman |
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Get all of these minorities out of my water park.
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p31.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Cartman: "Get all of these minorities out of my water park." ',1035,0)) - Season 13 - Pee
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| Jared |
I have aides.
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| Jared's girlfriend |
Oh my god!
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| Jared |
And when we have children, they'll have aides too!
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/logo_for_fb.png',' ','South Park Quotes','Jared: "I have aides." Jared\'s girlfriend: "Oh my god!" Jared: "And when we have children, they\'ll have aides too!" ',770,0)){kind=logo} - Season 6 - Jared Has Aides
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| Cartman |
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I want to get down on my knees and start pleasing Jesus. I want to feel his salvation all over my face.
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p31.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Cartman: "I want to get down on my knees and start pleasing Jesus. I want to feel his salvation all over my face." ',773,0)) - Season 7 - Christian Rock Hard
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| Butters |
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But fellas if I dress up like a dog with a star in my eye I'm gonna get grounded.
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| Cartman |
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Shut up Butters.
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p35.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Butters: "But fellas if I dress up like a dog with a star in my eye I\'m gonna get grounded." Cartman: "Shut up Butters." ',778,0)) - Season 8 - Good Times with Weapons
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| Stan |
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Dude, this is pretty f*cked up right here.
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p33.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Stan: "Dude, this is pretty f*cked up right here." ',941,0)) |
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| Cartman's Mom |
What's wrong hun?
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| Cartman |
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Well apparently Butters is gay and is attracted to me. So he snuck in my room and gave me a hickey.
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/logo_for_fb.png',' ','South Park Quotes','Cartman\'s Mom: "What\'s wrong hun?" Cartman: "Well apparently Butters is gay and is attracted to me. So he snuck in my room and gave me a hickey." ',1178,0)){kind=logo} |
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| Kenny |
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Mmmphh hmmm!!
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p34.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Kenny: "Mmmphh hmmm!!" ',908,0)) |
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| Randy |
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What do we want?
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| Crowd |
Bigger doors!
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| Randy |
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Where do we want them? Weed stores!
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![Publish to Facebook Wall](javascript:publish_feed('http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/quotes/south-park/','http://www.showmefunny.co.uk/images/actors/p44.jpg',' ','South Park Quotes','Randy: "What do we want?" Crowd: "Bigger doors!" Randy: "Where do we want them? Weed stores!" ',886,0)) - Season 14 - Medicinal Fried Chicken
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