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Scrubs Quotes
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Here are the funniest quotes from Scrubs. If you like JD, Turk, Janitor and the rest of the characters, you'll love these funny quotes. Feel free to add your own funny Scrubs quotes. There is a form at the bottom of the page.
| Ted |
 With all the cycling, apparently I've done a real number on my sperm, mine don't have any tails, they are just kinda blobs that roll from place to place.
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| Carla |
Do you know why Dr Cox stays with Dr Miller?
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| Turk |
Cos she has big-ass boobies.
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| JD's girlfriend |
Is that a roll of quarters in you pocket or are you having a real good time?
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| JD |
Actually it's a roll of quarters, it's laundry day.
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| Carla |
Turk, for the last time, mermaids are not real.
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| Turk |
I know what I saw woman!
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| Turk |
Count it! Honky face!
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| JD |
Shaun, you and I have had sex with the same women, therefore we are wiener cousins.
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| JD |
We'll take it from here chuckles.
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| JD |
How was your weekend?
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| Dorky Intern |
Well I bought some new soap, turns out I allergic to it, I tried to get a refund, but I lost the receipt.
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| JD |
I was hoping you'd just say fine.
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| Turk |
I haven't been to the future yet, but I may be the greatest surgeon of all time.
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| JD |
Eagle!
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