Randy Marsh Quotes

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Randy		Oh my God!
Comments		- Season 9 - Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow


Randy		Remember Stan, win or lose... Those are your two options win..or lose.
Comments		- Season 10 - Stanley's Cup


Randy		What do we want?
Crowd		Bigger doors!
Randy		Where do we want them? Weed stores!
Comments		- Season 14 - Medicinal Fried Chicken



Randy		I'm so startled!
Comments		- Season 12 - Pandemic 2 - The Startling


Randy		Global warming starts two days before the day after tomorrow... Oh my god, that's today!
Comments		- Season 9 - Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow


Randy		You've been on your computer all weekend. Shouldn't you go out and socialize with your friends?
Stan		I am socializing r-tard! I'm logged on to an MMORPG with people all over the world and getting XP with my party using teamspeak.
Randy		I'm not an r-tard.
Comments		- Season 10 - Make Love, Not Warcraft



Doctor		The test results came back, you have testicular cancer.
Randy		Score!
Comments		- Season 14 - Medicinal Fried Chicken


Randy		Stan, your grandma sent you a poke and you didn't poke her back.
Stan		But dad, I don't want to.
Randy		Stan poke your grandma!
Comments		- Season 14 - You Have 0 Friends


Randy		What seems to be the Officer, problem?
Comments



Randy		What I do!? Huh? What I do!? I'm sorry I thought this was america.
Comments		- Season 9 - The Losing Edge


Randy		Have you learned the importance of voting?
Stan		I've learned to choose between a douche and a turd sandwich, because it's usually the only option I've got.
Comments		- Season 8 - Douche and Turd


Randy		If we're still alive in the morning... then we'll know we're not dead.
Comments		- Season 10 - Cartoon Wars Part 1


Randy		I've gotten used to seeing anything I want at the click of a button. Once you jack off to Japanese girls puking inside each other's mouths you can't exactly go back to reading Playboy.
Comments		- Season 12 - Over Logging


Randy		No, this is just ectoplasm from the ghost. Did you see that ghost?
Comments		- Season 12 - Over Logging


Randy		Oooh! ...naggers.
Comments		Quote Entered by: Caboose Eduardo Torres - Season 11 - With Apologies to Jesse Jackson


Randy		Listen son, I have SARS. There's only a 98% chance that i will survive.
Comments		- Season 7 - Red Man's Greed


Randy		It was a ghost... Ectoplasm.
Comments


Randy		Creme Fraiche! Cafeteria Fraiche!
Stan		Dad.... What are you doing?
Randy		Falalalala! Fraichee!
Comments		Quote Entered by: Julia Ann Lightner - Season 14 - Creme Fraiche


Randy		Oh, I thought a group of Vietnamese people where having their intestines pulled out through their mouths.
Comments		- Season 7 - Christian Rock Hard


Randy		I'm not an r-tard.
Comments		- Season 10 - Make Love, Not Warcraft


Randy		I was thinking, we could turn the homeless into tyres, so we would still have homeless but we could use them, on our cars.
Comments		- Season 11 - Night of the Living Homeless


Randy		In the outside world I'm a simple geologist. But in here I am Valcore, defender of the alliance.
Comments


Sharron Marsh		Stan why don't you play with your future self?
Randy		Yeah Stan, go play with yourself.
Comments		- Season 6 - My Future Self n' Me


Mr Broflovski		Maybe we should strip these jackets off and warm our bodies together!
Randy		Don't be a fag!
Comments		- Season 9 - Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow


Randy		We need more Smores Schnapps!
Comments		- Season 3 - The Red Badge of Gayness


Citizen		Oh my god a guine-bear!
Randy		No! Thats a guine-mouse stupid!
Comments		- Season 12 - Pandemic 2 - The Startling


Cartman		I clocked you at 40 miles an hour back there ... You know what the speed is hmmya?
Randy		We'll, according to that sign right there it's 40 miles an hour.
Cartman		Step out of the car please sir.
Comments		- Season 2 - Chickenlover


Randy		Just getting a little bit of cancer Stan, tell mom not to worry.
Comments		- Season 14 - Medicinal Fried Chicken


Randy		I think it's best if you go live with Kyle son. His dad is better than me.
Kyle		What? No he's not! He cant even get an erection!
Randy		He he, really?
Comments		- Season 3 - Spontaneous Combustion


Randy		We're gonna top that with a little... Creme Fraiche.
Comments		- Season 14 - Creme Fraiche


Randy		How am I supposed to watch Internet porn now?!
Mrs Marsh		What did you just say?
Comments


Randy		Hey Stan? I sent you a friend request and you didn't accept?
Stan		Dad I don't care about this facebook crap.
Randy		Sooo... Were not friends?
Comments


Scientist		Global warming will strike two days before the day after tommorow.
Randy		Oh my God. Thats today!
Comments		- Season 9 - Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow


Randy		There's more to life than just profits.
Government Officer		Well like what?
Randy		Um well you know... Slurpees and stuff.
Comments


Randy		AIDS is finally funny!
Comments		- Season 6 - Jared Has Aides


Randy		Aww f*ck yeah... That's awesome!
Comments		Quote Entered by: Paige Taylor - Season 14 - Creme Fraiche


Stan		I have to admit to something. I broke the dam.
Randy		I... Understand! He's trying to say that, in a way, we all broke the dam!
Stan		No, I really broke the dam. I drove some guy's boat into it and broke it.
Comments		Quote Entered by: Kati Dery


Stan		Wait, I just realized this is even gayer than the pile!
Randy		You heard him, everyone back in the pile!
Comments		Quote Entered by: Kati Dery


Sharon Marsh		Stan, where have you been?
Randy		Your mother has been worried sick! And I have been watching tv...
Comments		- Season 10 - Stanley's Cup