Glen Quagmire Quotes

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Quagmire		Who would you have sex with Brian or meg?
Peter		Ohhh I would defo choose brian Meg is ugly.
Brian		What the f*ck?
Comments		- Season 2 - Wasted Talent


Peter		Why are all these parallelograms here?
Quagmire		You mean paraplegics?
Comments		- Season 5 - No Meals on Wheels


Peter		You don't know for sure if that's your baby Glenn.
Baby		Giggity.
Quagmire		Ooh... I say that.
Comments		- Season 8 - Quagmire's Baby



Quagmire		You're overreacting Lois. And you can't spell overreacting without ovary... because you're a woman.
Comments		- Season 5 - Airport '07


Quagmire		Er Brian how would you feel if Dylan was in a fire?
Brian		Oh my god, I don't even want to think about that, oh my god.
Comments		- Season 6 - The Former Life of Brian


Lois' Sister		All my other marriages have blown up in my face.
Quagmire		Giggidy.
Comments



Quagmire		I smuggled whole bunch of fireworks back in my anus.
Peter		Quaqmire, fireworks aren't illegal here, you could have just put them in your car and driven them here.
Quagmire		Oh, yeah, that's just as fun.
Comments


Quagmire		Am I the only one getting a boner right now?
Cleveland		What doesn't give you a boner, Glenn?
Quagmire		When people say "rubbish", when they mean trash.
Comments		- Season 7 - Baby Not on Board


Quagmire		Would you have sex with Cleveland, if it meant you could have sex with Angelina Jolie?
Comments		- Season 6 - Believe It or Not, Joe's Walking on Air



Quagmire		Gigaty, gigaty goo, let's have sex.
Comments		- Season 4 - Peter's got Woods


Quagmire		Who would you rather have sex with? A very pregnant Gina Gershon or Jenny McCarthy after a car accident?
Comments		- Season 6 - Believe It or Not, Joe's Walking on Air


Peter		Hey Quagmire did u get any last night?
Quagmire		What a stupid question!
Comments		- Season 4 - Patriot Games


Quagmire		Dear diary, jackpot.
Comments		- Season 5 - Barely Legal


Lois		Hey Peter, I just got myself waxed so let's just say you're ready for clear landing.
Quagmire		Giggity!
Comments		- Season 4 - Model Misbehaviour


Quagmire		Well hello, you must be this beautiful to ride the Quagmire..
Comments		Quote Entered by: Michael Saddler - Season 2 - A Picture is Worth a 1,000 Bucks


Quagmire		Giggity giggity goo.
Comments		Quote Entered by: Tianna Van Cura


Bachelorette		Quagmire, will you accept this rose?
Quagmire		What even after I tried to drug you and have sex with your unconscious body? Oh never mind gigidy.
Comments		- Season 4 - Brian the Bachelor


Quagmire		Alright!
Comments


Quagmire		How long you been in beauty school?
Girl		2 months.
Quagmire		Good, because today we're working on facials.
Comments		Quote Entered by: Connor Gorman


Quagmire		Soccer mums, all right!
Comments


Quagmire		I wouldn't like to come between you two... Or would I?
Comments


Quagmire		Hey uh Peter, you wouldn't happen to have a card that apologizing for giving a woman aids?
Peter		Uhmmm... Here we go, sorry I accidentally gave u STD.
Quagmire		Oh, that's all you have, accidental? Ok I'll take it. Thanks Peter
Comments


Quagmire		Giggidy!
Comments		Quote Entered by: Jonathan Freitas Teixeira - Season 9 - Halloween on Spooner Street


Carter Pewterschmidt		In an hour and a half I'm gonna piss away 20 grand.
Quagmire		What, are you bettin on the knicks.
Comments		- Season 7 - Ocean's Three and a Half


Quagmire		My fellow americans. I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did gigoogidy that girl. I gishmoigideed her giflaygidee with my googus. And I am sorry.
Comments


Lois		Something's poking me.
Quagmire		Shhh, it's just my penis
Comments		Quote Entered by: Cole Law


Quagmire		I've been having sex with every woman in town, non-stop for the past two days. If I tried to masturbate right now, you know what'd come out?.. A little flag with the word: Bang on it.
Comments		- Season 5 - It Takes a Village Idiot, I Married One


Quagmire		We're, umm playing a game.
Peter		What is it?
Quagmire		Sex.
Comments		- Season 4 - Petergeist


Lois		Something is poking my leg!
Quagmire		Shh shh shh shh... It's just my wang.
Comments		- Season 5 - Meet the Quagmires