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Eric Cartman Quotes

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Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI hate democrats!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhat awaits everyone in heaven is eternal bliss, divine rest and ten thousand dollars cash.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 9 - The Death of Eric Cartman
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteG.I.N.G.E.Rs don't have souls so they can't be pirates.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - Fatbeard
 
Mr Garrison Mr Garrison Open QuoteNot all Muslim people are terrorists.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNo, but most of them are, and all it takes is most of them.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - The Snuke
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou are a rabbit and I am a human. So if you don't bring me what I want for Easter, I can f*cking kill you!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Fantastic Easter Special
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteRespect my authoriteee!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Mallory Waters
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm not fat.Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteYes you are! You're f*cking fat, fat ass!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteKick his ass craig if u don't I will f*ckin butt rape you and you'll bleed from your asshole so don't f*ck it up. Bitch!Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteAlright, Tweek now I know you don't wanna fight him but god dammit if u lose and Cartman wins the bet I will stab u in the neck.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 3 - Tweek vs Craig
 
Chef Open QuoteIt seems we need to discuss a problem here.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAh yes the Jew problem. Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Lice Capades
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMy dad was a GINGER!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 14 - 201
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou f*cking Jew! Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteFat f*ck!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Death
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteSuck my balls!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Damon Wardwell
 
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteOh my god. They are going to cut off Ike's penis.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou don't call it a penis you call it a fireman. If you call it a penis you will get a spanking and get sent to timeout. Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 2 - Ike's Wee Wee
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAre you sure?Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteYes!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAre you HIV positive?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - Tonsil Trouble
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm sorry Kyle but you have the three J's...Jinger Jersey Jew.Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteShut the f*ck up fatty!!!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 14 - It's a Jersey Thing
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteIt's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a woman's separation to increase the population. This type of penetration will increase the younger generation.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 4 - Do the Handicapped Go to Hell?
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou need a friend. A chocolate friend.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 4 - Fat Camp
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteGet all of these minorities out of my water park.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - Pee
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI want to get down on my knees and start pleasing Jesus. I want to feel his salvation all over my face.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Christian Rock Hard
 
Butters Butters Open QuoteBut fellas if I dress up like a dog with a star in my eye I'm gonna get grounded.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteShut up Butters.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - Good Times with Weapons
 
Cartman's Mom Open QuoteWhat's wrong hun?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWell apparently Butters is gay and is attracted to me. So he snuck in my room and gave me a hickey.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteYeah, what's there to hate about rainbows?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWell, you know, you'll just be sitting there, minding your own business, and they'll come, marching in and crawl up your leg and start biting the inside of your ass. And you'll be all like, ay! Get out of my ass you stupid rainbows!Close Quote
Stan Stan Open QuoteCartman, what the hell are you talking about?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Weight Gain 4000
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHow do I reach these kiiids?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteKyle u dirty Jew bag!Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteShut up fat ass!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig
 
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteI just don't get it, if it makes you crap blood why do you still eat it?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHave you ever had chipotle?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - Dead Celebrities
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWestsiede!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteWait! Isn't there some rule about not getting in the car with strangers?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNo. Not when money is envolved, stupid!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Mecha-Streisand
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteDude dolphins are intelligent and friendly!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYeah, intelligent and friendly on rye bread with some mayonnaise.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Mr Garrison Mr Garrison Open QuoteHow would you like to go to the principal's office?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHow would you like to suck my balls?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteWow, this place is huge.Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteYeah almost as big as cartmans ass!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNo it isn't you guys.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Danny Vulganius
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm not just sure, I'm HIV positive.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOkay Token now give me a smooth bass line.Close Quote
Token Token Open QuoteI told you I don't know to play bass.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteToken, how many times do we have to go over this? You're black, you know how to play bass.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Christian Rock Hard
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhy don't you girls go wash some dishes or get pregnant or something.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteOne hundred thousand dollars!!!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteThat's enough to buy slaves.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - Britney's New Look
 
Butters Butters Open QuoteYou think girls tuck their balls up into the inside of their tummies?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWe're done talking about girls balls now Butters. Focus!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - The List
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou're breaking my balls here.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHa ha ha ha, I did it! It's the greatest picture ever! I took a picture of butters weiner in my mouth! Ha ha ha, he's so gay now!Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteNo dude that makes you gay..Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNu-hu,Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteCrap filled vagina.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Le Petit Tourette
 
Butters Butters Open QuoteBoy this town sure smells funny.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWell maybe that's why it's called Ass-pen!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 6 - Asspen
 
Mr Garrison Mr Garrison Open QuoteDoes anyone know what sexual harassment is?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhen you are trying to have intercourse with a lady and someone tickles your balls from behind.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHandle it? For two billion dollars I would handle my grandpa's balls sir.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Butt Out
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteJust like the victims of breast cancer there is something I would like to get off my chest.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - Breast Cancer Show Ever
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNot visit Mr Jefferson anymore? Well excuse my french Mrs Marsh but you can suck my fat hairy balls.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - The Jeffersons
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteButters, remind me later to cut your balls off.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Christian Rock Hard
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteLame!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - AWESOM-O
 
Hotel Valet Open QuoteHey, you can't park there!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteIt's ok, I'm a hall monitor!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteScrew you guys im going home!Close Quote
Stan Stan Open QuoteBut, Cartman we are trying to..Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteScrew you guys, home.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI am a cop and you will respect my authoritah!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Kati Dery - Season 2 - Chickenlover
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteButters, you don't shoot a guy in the dick.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - The China Problem
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI don't give a crap about whales, so go hug a tree!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - Whale Whores
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteSuck my balls!!!Close Quote
Ms Chokesondick Open QuotePresent them.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhat?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 4 - 4th Grade
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteDon't mind Kyle everyone, he just has a little sand in his vagina.Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteThere's no sand in my vagina!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 5 - It Hits the Fan
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOkay our mission failed, yet we learned a lot-primarily that girls don't have balls.Close Quote
Butters Butters Open QuoteThey sure don't.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - The List
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteGirls don't think I'm fat, they know I'm buff.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - The List
 
Mr Garrison Mr Garrison Open QuoteApparently, we have a little problem here at the school, that we need to talk about.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAarh, yes, you mean the Jew problem.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Lice Capades
 
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteCartman I thought you were going to kill yourself.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI tried to. I turned my moms car on and slept there the whole night. F*ckin' hybrids man. They just dont do the trick.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - Elementary School Musical
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteKyle! I swear if I didn't have a guys hand up my ass I would leap across the room and kick you in the NUTS!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOoh ouch! Ma'am let go of that tight grip you have on my balls, you are breaking my balls Ma'am.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - Goobacks
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNo kitty this is my pot pie, no kitty! Mom! Kitty's being a little dildo!Close Quote
Cartman's Mom Open QuoteWell then I know a certain little kitty who's sleeping with mommy tonight.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Kati Dery - Season 1 - Cartman Gets an Anal Probe
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYour family is black Token, you are bound to have a bass guitar somewhere in your basement.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Christian Rock Hard
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteTell em Ma.Tell em how I'm just big boned. Tell about how all the kids in your family were big boned as a child and grew out of it.Close Quote
Ms Cartman Open QuoteUm sweety... Those were lies. Ur just fat.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAyyee!!!!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 4 - Fat Camp
 
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteYou can't say f*ck in school you f*ckin fat ass!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWell why the f*ck not?... It's not like it hurts anybody! F*ck f*ckity f*ck f*ck f*ck!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: KayLee Weller
 
Kyle's Cousin Open QuoteIs anyone else having problems concentrating on this? I just can't seem to concentrate.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMaybe we should send you to a concentration camp.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 5 - The Entity
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWatch out guys! Killer tities on the loose!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - Breast Cancer Show Ever
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHey what the hell are you doing?Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteOh hey Cartman, I was just playing Dreidel! You wanna try?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteSuurrreee! I've got a little dreidel, it's small and made of clay! But I'm not gonna play with it 'cos dreidel's freaking gay!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 3 - Mr Hankey's Christmas Classics
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOk do you have the essays?Close Quote
Mexican Open QuoteYeah, I wrote my essay in California.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHow would you like to suck my balls?Close Quote
Mr Garrison Mr Garrison Open QuoteWhat did you say?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOh I'm sorry, actually what i said was, how would you like to suck my balls Mr. Garrison?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Joe Seaward
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHello Ma'am, we are going around town offering a snow shovelling service, would you like your driveway and sidewalks shovelled for eight thousand dollars?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - Goobacks
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteRed rocket! Red rocket!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 5 - Proper Condom Use
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou shouldn't ever use the term fag, Kyle, that's a hate word and it's insensitive to butt pilots.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - The Coon
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm not fat, I just have a sweet hockey body.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Grey Dawn
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOooh is that envy in your eye's Craig? Mmmm yes, drown me in the sweet waters of your envy.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - Good Times with Weapons
 
Officer Barbrady Open QuoteYou can't kidnap people and lock them in your basement.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteThey're not people, they're hippies!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 9 - Die Hippie, Die
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteShe smelled my finger and puked!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm not fat, I'm big boned!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Jake Miller
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm addicted to abortions!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - W.T.F.
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou suck cock.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 3 - Sexual Harassment Panda
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteBad kitty!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Cartman Gets an Anal Probe
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm not fat, I'm just festively plump.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Mr Hankey, the Christmas Poo
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAttention shoppers, cripple fight outside.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 5 - Cripple Fight
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI slaughtered 5 baby seals with my bare hands. I do what i want!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 6 - Freak Strike
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou're a chick, dude.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - Breast Cancer Show Ever
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteIt's just that he killed 23 babies.Close Quote
Crowd Member Open QuoteYeah but it was in self defense!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHe killed 23 babies in self defense?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 6 - Free Hat
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteOh my god! The video game caused Kenny to have a seizure!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteDude, sweet!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 3 - Chinpokomon
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteToken, we are making a Christian rock band. Get your bass guitar from your basement and get to my house in 30 minutes.Close Quote
Token Token Open QuoteBut, I don't have a bass guitar in my basement.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteToken. You're black. All black people have bass guitars in their basement.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteWe rip on everyone; like Cartman for being fat, and Cartman for being stupid, and Cartman for having a sadistic whore for a mom.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHey, you did me already!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteCome on dude, you don't care about whales, you just want to be on TV.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI deserve to be on TV.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - Whale Whores
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNo Starvin' Marvin that's Kenny's cream corn.Close Quote
Kenny Kenny Open QuoteMphh.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNo Starvin' Marvin that's a bad Starvin' Marvin!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Zachary LoveYa Cerio - Season 1 - Starvin' Marvin
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm killing you, but unfortunately I could only afford a wiffle bat, so it's going to take a while... Don't fight it Kyle, it'll only take longer, just slip into sweet unconsciousness.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Toilet Paper
 
Cartman Cartman Open Quote(Talking about Rob Reiner) Isn't he awesome you guys? Dude, he just goes round imposing his will on people, he's my idle.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Butt Out
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteF**K off Whistling Whilly, I'm not in the mood.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - Quest for Ratings
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou just dealt with the Dowg, bitch!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 10 - Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAaargh yeah, hallo please, ching chong ping pow!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - The China Problem
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhats up, whats up, I crapped on your desk dowg, whats up with that?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - Breast Cancer Show Ever
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOh wow, a Jew asking for money, thats a new one.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 9 - The Death of Eric Cartman
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm not going to heck Butters, I'm not black!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 9 - The Death of Eric Cartman
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWow, only three more hours sea-people. Only three more hours and you can take me away from this crappy, god-damn planet full of hippies.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 6 - Simpsons Already Did It
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou shouldn't have done that, he's just a boy, poor little fella.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHmm, I can't possibly finish this whole cake, oh wait, yes I can.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 2 - City on the Edge of Forever
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYeah, Hanukah sucks!Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteDon't you oppress me, fat boy!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteDon't call me fat! Buttf*cker!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteYou don't even know anything about Christianity.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI know enough to exploit it.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Christian Rock Hard
 
Cartman's Mom Open QuoteWant some Cheezy Poofs honey?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteF*ck yeah, I want some god damned Cheezy Poofs!!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNASCAR is for poor and stupid people!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 14 - Poor and Stupid
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI just took a huge dump.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 10 - Make Love, Not Warcraft
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteFag!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAw, weak! Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Cartman Gets an Anal Probe
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteIt's my body, I do what I want!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Paige Taylor
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhoever he is, he is one f*cking bad-ass! Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 10 - Make Love, Not Warcraft
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhy does every thing need to be coming in or out of my ass today?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Cartman Gets an Anal Probe
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAaaaaah! Stan you scared the piss out of me!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteThat's a bad Mr Kitty, and I smack him on the head!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 3 - Rainforest Schmainforest
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteDo you know what this is? It's apple juice and it gives me super bad farts.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI am the candy-master.Close Quote
Stan Stan Open QuoteNo, you're the ass-master, there is a difference.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Pinkeye
 
Towelie Open QuoteDon't preach to me fatso!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteShut-up, you're a towel!Close Quote
Towelie Open QuoteYou're a towel!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 5 - Towelie
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNo kitty! Those are my cheese poofs!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteSpoog, balls, bloody, vaginal belch.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Le Petit Tourette
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteSh*t head, butt-hole, Mexican stinky ballsClose Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Le Petit Tourette
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhat do you call a Jewish woman's boobs... Joobs!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteThat's right I've got a bad case of ADD no homework for me.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 4 - Timmy 2000
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMr. Garrison you can suck my balls.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteGuys, Mr. Garrison has a vagina!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 9 - Mr Garrison's Fancy New Vagina
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNow I will use my powers to... Turn Kyle into a chicken!Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteGod-damnit, Cartman!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - Good Times with Weapons
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteAhhhhhhhh old people!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Grey Dawn
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHere you can eat all you want for 6.99 that's why we all come here on Tuesday nights, except Kenny's family because to them 6.99 is 2 years income.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Starvin' Marvin
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteGuys we should go to black barts cave first, because we'll want to go through it a million times.Close Quote
Stan Stan Open QuoteNo it's Kyle's birthday, we should do what ever he wants to do first.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhat f*ck Kyle?!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Casa Bonita
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMake no mistake Kyle, before this day is over you will suck my balls!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Imaginationland Episode 3
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI wasn't sleeping. I was just thinking really hard.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteBeefcake!Close Quote
Guy on TV Open QuoteBeefcake!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteBeefcake!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Weight Gain 4000
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWell f*ck you Kyle, I hope you die, I hope you f*cking die!!!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - Casa Bonita
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteEy! Get your bitch ass back in the kitchen and make me some pie!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteCartman will you give Kyle a kidneyClose Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteNo, no, no, no, no, no!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWell I'm half bi.Close Quote
Mr Garrison Mr Garrison Open QuoteStop it you kids aren't gay. And Eric your not half bi!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI might be a quarter bi. My grandpa was bi so that makes me a quarter bi!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - South Park is Gay
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteBenjamin Franklin?Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteNo dumb ass it's Kyle!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteKyle. Get out of my flashback you f*cking jew.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 7 - I'm a Little Bit Country
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteThere is a bomb threat on south park.Close Quote
Officer Barbrady Open QuoteAre you serious?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteIf I wasn't serious would I be if if talking in a low whisper for dramatic effect?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - The Snuke
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteScrew you guys, I'm going home!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall Quote Entered by: Ashton Hankins
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI have to get detention.Close Quote
Mr Garrison Mr Garrison Open QuoteEric did you just take a crap on my desk?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhat's up what's up.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 12 - Breast Cancer Show Ever
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteIt's illegal for a Jew to catch snow flakes in his mouth.Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteWhat? No. Officer Barbrady! Is it illegal for a jew to catch snowflakes in his mouth?Close Quote
Officer Barbrady Open QuoteUmm. Yes.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI said shut up you blood belching vagina!... Did I just call myself a blood belching vagina?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 6 - A Ladder to Heaven
 
Butters Butters Open QuoteUhm fellers can I come out now all you put in here was this bucket for me to poop in. What am I supposed to eat.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou got the bucket don't you?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteIf you mess with the dawg, you'll end up like that splattered bitch down on the pavement.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 10 - Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteThat movie has warped my fragile little mind.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteLying kicks ass!!!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 2 - The Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteCripple fight!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteGreetings I am Awesome-O.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - AWESOM-O
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteSo long Justin beiber you stupid little butthole.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteKyle you have to do this. If you want a quality friend you have to wade through all the dicks first.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 14 - You Have 0 Friends
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOh wow this is so tits!Close Quote
Cartman's Mom Open QuoteDon't say tits Eric.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI mean wow this is so cool!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 4 - The Tooth Fairy Tats 2000
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMom! More hot pockets!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 10 - Make Love, Not Warcraft
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI'm a little piggy heres my snout, oink oink oink, oink oink oink.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMom you're not going to believe it! I put a tooth under my pillow and the tooth fairy gave me five dollars! She's only gave me a lousy quarter before!Close Quote
Cartman's Mom Open QuoteOh yes and I think the tooth fairy wants you to use that money to create a savings account with compounded daily interest.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou can compound daily my ass with interest, I'm going to the toy store and buy me a skateboard!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 4 - The Tooth Fairy Tats 2000
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI hate hippies!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Kevin Open QuoteI have to ride in the middle of the boat, I get motion sickness.Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteKevin, Jesus Christ...Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - Fatbeard
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou know that feeling when you take a huge dump? Awesome.Close Quote
Stan Stan Open QuoteNow are you alright?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteYou know that feeling when the huge dump you just took shoots back up your ass? No I'm not alright!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Clyde Clyde Open QuoteThis is Samolia?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteDa f*ck?!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - Fatbeard
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteLooks like your about to get poned!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 10 - Make Love, Not Warcraft
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteIt's not potholes you need to worry about Mayor, it's the potheads.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMexican stinky balls!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Le Petit Tourette
 
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteHey,what you doing?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWhat does it look like I'm doing, I am eating my dinner?Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteOh, it looked like you where snogging a chicken!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuotePoor people don't have anything better to do than piss other people off.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 6 - A Ladder to Heaven
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteIt puts the lotion on it's skin or else it gets the hose again!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 6 - Bebe's Boobs Destroy Society
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteKenny an American girl's mouth is the dirtiest place you can put your penis.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 - The Ring
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMeeem, I know this might sound odd but go with me on this one... Meeem, can you take me to sign up for the special olympics so I can beat all the handicap kids and win a thousand dollars?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 8 - Up the Down Steriod
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteI didn't get a anal prob!Close Quote
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteDude yes you did!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteScrew you guys I'm going home!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 1 - Cartman Gets an Anal Probe
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteF*ck, f*ckity, f*ck f*ck f*ck!Close Quote
Mr Garrison Mr Garrison Open QuoteHow would you like to go see the school counsellor?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteHow would you like to suck my balls?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMmm! The tears of unfathomable sadness! They taste so good and sweet!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 5 - Scott Tenorman Must Die
 
Butters Butters Open QuoteCartman quick an army of Jewish robots are taking over the town!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteJew bots, what are they doing here?Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Kyle Kyle Open QuoteNo! You can't give Ike a circumcision! Don't you know how important men's firemen are to them?Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOh yes. The fireman is very magical. If you rub it's helmet, he spits in your eye!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 2 - Ike's Wee Wee
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteWell where the hell am I supposed to go!? I can't go to Kenny's house, I mean his family's freakin' poor!..... Ok fine I guess I'll just have to crash with you Kenny.Close Quote
Kenny Kenny Open QuoteF*ck you.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 10 - Tsst
 
Stan Stan Open QuoteCartman you suck at playing Americans vs Bosnians! From now on if you want to play, you can just play with yourself!Close Quote
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteThat's fine! I like playing with myself! I'll play with myself all day long!!Close Quote
Kenny Kenny Open QuoteAhahaha!!!!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 2 - Clubhouses
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteOh my God, this is Baghdad? Wow what a sh*t-hole!.. I mean wow look at all those poor, unfortunate people!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 6 - Red Sleigh Down
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteF*ck you hippies!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteKyle, now suck my balls!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - Imaginationland Episode 1
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteRace war!Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 11 - With Apologies to Jesse Jackson
 
Cartman Cartman Open QuoteMe and Kenny don't give two sh*ts about stupid ass whales.Close Quote
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Publish to Facebook Wall - Season 13 -